Straight No Chaser - 12 Days

And if that doesn't put you in the holiday mood - how about trying good old fashioned giving until it hurts.... and I don't mean a fruitcake regifted from your Aunt Hatty. Try pulling out your checkbook and trying one of these:

• International Rescue Committee. More than 4 million Iraqis have fled their homes because of violence, at least 2.2 million within Iraq and 1.8 million to other countries. This venerable NGO assists them in Jordan and southern Iraq, where many are living in desperate conditions, and will soon expand to Syria and northern Iraq. These are people who, thanks to our unprovoked and illegal war, have lost everything. Remember the Pottery Barn rule? We broke it; we have to fix it (write "Iraqi refugee relief" on your check; IRC, Box 98152, Washington, DC 20090-8152; theirc.org).

• Vietnam Vets Against the War. It's a different war, but VVAW is still organizing against it. These hardy campaigners wage protests, support soldiers who resist the war, address classrooms, demystify the false promises of recruiters, help homeless veterans and support Iraq Veterans Against the War. They run on a shoestring, and Howard Zinn says we should send them money--and I always try to do what Howard Zinn says (VVAW National Office, Box 408594, Chicago, IL 60640; vvaw.org).

• Women for Afghan Women. Afghanistan is one of the world's poorest countries, where billions of development dollars have been wasted by a large cast of schemers. This group is different. Headed by the indefatigable Fahima Vorgetts, the WAW's Afghan Women's Fund provides material aid, healthcare and literacy classes, vocational training and organizes small businesses and women's co-ops. AWF has built three girls' schools and will be starting construction on a fourth in the spring. For $50 a month, you can support an orphan and give him or her a shot at a future (make checks out to WAW/AWF, 978 Yachtsman Way, Annapolis, MS 21403; womenforafghanwomen.org).

• Organization of Women's Freedom in Iraq. The war has made life more dangerous for Iraqi women both inside and outside the family. Heroic secular feminist Yanar Mohammed runs the only women's shelters in Iraq, plus an Underground Railroad to help women escape from abuse and threats of "honor killing." You can help Iraqi women start newer, safer lives by writing a check to MADRE, the women's international social justice organization, with OWFI in the memo line; MADRE, 121 West 27th Street #301, New York, NY 10001; www.madre.org.

Many thanks to Katha Pollitt at the Nation for these suggestions. See more here.

Cardiac Arrest

Okay, so I've been having some issues with my blood pressure. Can't imagine why, since I'm so calm, cool, and collected in the face of Armageddon with Mr. Deciderer at the helm. And global warming. And recently relocating my business... while teaching a 12 week class... and mediating recent marital difficulties with Number One son and his lovely bride. Did I mention Christmas is like 2 and a half weeks away? Can't imagine why my BP decided to shoot for the moon, but I suddenly found myself listening to my pounding heart in my ears. Time to head to one of those fine American physicians that I get to choose for myownself.

So I go off to see the PA ($28 copay for the short visit,) who is aghast at the numbers on my very proactive little two week stat sheet and decides that yes, hallelujah, I am hypertensive and need medication. Shit. But wait there's more. She wants to rule out something other than "my magic hypertension gene has suddenly come to life" as a probable cause. So she writes up a referral to my friendly neighborhood vampire for a simple blood test. Cholesterol, fasting blood sugar and thyroid function to be exact.

I'm an obedient sort, so I head to the hospital first thing Monday morning to open a vein. Takes about 3 minutes from start to finish (I mean the one vial of blood thing, not the 45 minutes of check in and registration.) Less than a week later I get a tidy report that I'm perfectly healthy - except for the BP thing, of course. I'm popping my daily pill now and everything is going swimmingly until...

I have a heart attack when I get the f-ing bill.

So how much do you think simple lipids, blood sugar and thyroid tests cost? One vial of blood. Three minutes to stick me, probably another ten to add some chemicals and read the thing. We are not talking NUCLEAR MEDICINE here... we are not talking CUTTING EDGE TECHNOLOGY. We are talking $299. My very expensive, for the self employed, high deductible, catastrophic coverage pays less than half of that. $160 to tell me I'm perfectly fine.

The kicker - and reason that I'm ranting - is this. The very same hospital offers two of those three tests for $50 AND throws in an EKG and calls it a "heart health screening." So when you hear someone ranting about frivolous lawsuits and how trial lawyers are the reason our health insurance rates are so spectacular, consider what those delightful, of our own choosing, health care providers are CHARGING those insurance companies. And be afraid.

Good thing I'm so healthy, since my plan is going up 33% in January.